Hello!
LONG TIME!
I went home because its been too long.. what with last weekend being my brothers 2 year death and my grandpa died last week and with the snow storm i was stuck in hendersonville and not able to visit my friend in asheville.
so i wandered the streets., drank coffee and tried to think of things to look up at the coffee shop... waiting for someone friendly to come in so i could chat with them. but no

THOUGH
i did have two 44 year old men buy me drinks/dinner..
one on last Friday (i sat at the bar at an Irish Pub where i was applying to work and this friendly guy started chatting me up beside me. we talked for a good 2 and a half hours.. about love.. about growing up.. about relationships.. very insightful.. i enjoy asking people how they knew they were in Love)
------AND he introduced me to a new drink.. he offered to buy me a drink.. i said SURE! but.. since YOU are buying the drink, i want YOU to choose what I get.. My life is in your hands.."
and he ordered me one called "Chocolate Cake"
and it tasted JUST like a chocolate cake.. (Absolute Citron and Fragelico Hazelnut Liquer.. wiiith a sugar coated rim and lemon wedge

---MONDAY night i was walking out of a bar that i had applied to just as some guy did and we got to talking as we walked down the street together and he asked if i would stop in for a drink with him and that i looked like a needed a good decent meal (..ED bells ring ring ring! "yay.. someone notices the hard work ive been doing".. battled with "LIAR!.. i dont look a thing different than before..)
he bought me a chicken Caesar wrap .. and i ate the WHOLE thing.. PLUS the fries.. AND then an slice of apple pie.. my body was starving.. so was i.. emotionally, physically.. we talked we talked.. he told me about me.. he was like this therapist/fortune teller.. I cannt even BEGIN to tell you the world of things he said to me that WERE TRUE without me telling .. creepy.. but satisfying..
it was mostly nice to have someone INTERESTED in ME.. wanting to know about me.. taking interest in me.. taking care of me.. PAYING for me..
it was a shock.. it was a surprise.. it was pleasant..

and still i go home do the same thing over and over again.. exercise video.. or coffe shop and then video.. and then safe comfort soup and then sleep/movie..
and the weather has been making it so that the kids dont come to school which means that i dont go to to work so i have dayssss of nothingggg to do with noo onee

i got fed up
tired of it all
went home
and im glad im here